Relationships have their ups and downs, and it’s important to be able to identify problems so that you can address and solve them or get out before they drag you down. Sometimes there’s no big betrayal or no underlying issue, you just get the sense that your boyfriend is no longer as into you as he once was. If you notice the following things happening, you may be right.
He doesn’t text you as much anymore.
If you notice your boyfriend has started texting you less and less, there’s a good chance he’s just busy, so before you go feeling like the sky is falling, check in with him. Some guys may lie about being busy, of course, so if it’s 3:00 pm on a Saturday and you know he’s usually just playing video games then, maybe he’s just avoiding you. In this instance, you may want to try calling him. Pay close attention to his tone and the vibe you get from him. If he’s not into the conversation, then there’s a good chance he just isn’t into you anymore.
Your sex life is as good as dead.
Sex is an important part of any healthy relationship. If you notice your partner isn’t interested in having sex with you anymore, something may seriously be wrong. Note that this doesn’t have to be your fault or related to the relationship. He could simply be stressed out or distracted by something else. Try to spice things up a little and explore each other’s fantasies. Try wearing lingerie, introducing toys, and even a playmate into the relationship. If that doesn’t work, then maybe he’s losing interest and you need to accept the bitter truth.
He isn’t romantic anymore.
Did he suddenly stop bringing you flowers or taking you out on dates? Does he no longer compliment you, flirt, or make romantic gestures? This could be because the honeymoon phase has passed and he doesn’t think he has to try as hard anymore. In this case, initiate the romance yourself and do things to add that spark. If it still doesn’t feel right, you may want to reassess how you feel about the relationship.
He’s defensive and starts arguments.
An increase in arguments may be a sign of something deeper in a relationship. If he suddenly gets defensive and nitpicks, he may be looking for a way out. Before you go packing your bags, try to find out his triggers and consider therapy as a way of moving past this rough patch.
He’s vague and doesn’t communicate openly.
The key to any successful relationship is communication. If your guy holds back in his communication, it may mean he’s no longer interested in you and therefore doesn’t see the need to. Try following him up on anything he says that is seemingly vague and ask for clarification. If he’s willing to do this, then maybe he just needs to work on his communication skills. However, if he dodges your questions or makes you feel like a bother, maybe it’s better to take stock.
He’s always too busy.
They say you make time for the ones you care about, but life can get in the way of that sometimes. Some things are out of your partner’s control, like having to deal with family or having greater responsibilities in a new job. In this case, you’re better off working with his schedule instead of creating an unnecessary conflict. If there’s evidence to suggest that he’s making himself seem busier than he really is, then it’s time to reevaluate this relationship and get out before it shatters your self-worth.
There’s no talk about the future.
Couples generally plan their next move, whether it’s about getting married and moving in or going on a vacation together. The plans may even be as simple as seeing a movie together once it hit theatres. A guy who avoids talk of the future may not intend to be around for it. In this case, you need to be direct and ask him about his intentions. If they’re to just string you along in a stagnant, unproductive relationship, then get out before you find yourself resentful and bitter years in the future.
He doesn’t want to hang out or talk.
We all go through different things in our lives which sometimes causes us to shut down and wish to be alone. If your boyfriend is going through a rough patch and is clearly distancing himself from you, don’t try to make this about you. Give him time and space to gather his thoughts and emotions so you can better support him once he reaches out to you. While it may take different people different lengths of time to recover, it’s important to not place yourself in a hopeless situation. If he engages with others, maybe it’s just you.
He’s always out with friends.
If your partner prefers to go out with his friends than hang out with you, it can be pretty hurtful and may be a sign that he’s losing interest. You may remedy this by trying to get along with his friends so you can all spend time together and see how he reacts. If he strongly objects, then maybe he’s not in the frame of mind for a relationship. Get out and do your own thing, hang out with your friends, get a hobby, and see where it goes.
You feel like you aren’t a priority.
You should be a priority to your guy, no matter how long you’ve been together. He should make an effort to maintain and strengthen the relationship and it shouldn’t be a one-sided thing. If you don’t feel like a priority, communicate your feelings to him. If he doesn’t make an effort to change or actively dismisses your feelings, it’s obvious that he’s not interested in you or how you feel.
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